


i wake up still high on you

by exexlovers (orphan_account)



Category: Falsettos - Lapine/Finn
Genre: Holding Hands, Humor, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Internalized Homophobia, Light Angst, M/M, Pre-Canon, Slow Dancing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-06-29
Packaged: 2020-05-30 19:31:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19409908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/exexlovers
Summary: 'he stood up, taking the mug out of whizzer’s hands and setting it on the shelf. “c’mere.” he pulled him gently into the open space between the kitchen and the living room. whizzer’s expression was amused and confused as marvin placed his free hand on his waist, lifting their hands into the air.'⤷ closeted marvin’s late-night visit to whizzer’s apartment.





	i wake up still high on you

**Author's Note:**

> the song that inspired this fic: [x](https://open.spotify.com/track/12d0oildmCSVKRW7SEHaZP?si=n7lDbXKQQGKCeqBpgaFKug)

Sometimes it was unnerving how attracted Marvin was to boys. He hadn’t mastered how to flirt with them yet, and he was still figuring out the difference in dynamic. It was almost like he was living a double life; a married father during the day and a drunk gay man at night. Whizzer referred to it as being a ‘gay spy.’ That label scared him too. He definitely felt something with Trina, but it was all past tense. He was attracted to girls in the past. So was he still gay?

  


It was a steady battle, but at least he knew he was attracted to Whizzer. He loved Whizzer. Their relationship wasn’t very emotional, but Marvin wanted him to know he was wanted. Trina always liked flowers. Whizzer mentioned them once. Maybe comparing relationships was unhealthy, but his marriage was all he knew.

  


So he came to Whizzer’s apartment with his hands full of white tulips. He had researched tulips; they represented the arrival of spring. He liked to imagine Whizzer as a warm, loving arrival after a frozen, sad winter. Cheesy, maybe, but that was how he felt deep inside. 

  


Marvin knocked on Whizzer’s door, struggling with the flowers. He studied the oak wood as he waited, tracing his eyes over the gold numbers and letters labelling the apartment. The lock clicked from the inside and Whizzer opened the door a tiny bit, squinting at the light from the hall.

  


“Hey,” he opened the door wider, his eyes sparkling once he realized the person at the door was Marvin. “Come in. Is that flowers?”

  


Marvin giggled nervously, closing the door behind him. “Uh, yeah. Wanted to remind you that I appreciate you.”

  


Whizzer hummed. “Cute.” he reached into his cupboard for a vase, sliding a baby pink one out and filling it with water from the sink. “Thanks, Marv.”

  


“Yeah, sure.” Marvin handed them over, watching him drop them into the vase. He felt like he was in a trance. Whizzer turned around, leaning on his circular dining table. He tilted his head.

  


“Hey. Are you okay?” he searched Marvin’s face, brushing his fingers over the wood table.

  


Marvin blinked, looking Whizzer over. It was late at night, so he had pajamas on. It wasn’t much, just grey sweatpants and ankle socks, but somehow he pulled it off as an acceptable outfit. Black clay streaked under his eyes, an acne treatment to already-perfect skin. His hair was messy, seemingly washed and untouched to dry. “Yeah, yeah. You’re pretty.”

  


Whizzer chuckled. “Thanks.” he reached for Marvin’s hand, guiding him gently to a chair and sitting across from him. “It’s flattering how you still find me attractive when I’m freshly showered and in pajamas. It’s late, did you get any sleep yesterday? I missed cuddling you when you weren’t here.”

  


“I got sleep, yeah. A little hard when your wife is yelling at you for being away so often, but I slept.”

  


Whizzer smiled half-heartedly, leaning his chin in his hand. “We talked about that already. Can we ignore it for tonight?”

  


“Sure, yeah. Sorry.”

  


“It’s fine, I get it.” he eyed the tulips, the pink vase complementing the white and light wood scheme of the apartment. “The flowers are nice. Do they mean anything?”

  


Marvin felt his cheeks heat up. “Yeah. Tulips signify the arrival of something new. A sign of spring after winter.”

  


“Are you calling me your personal spring?”

  


Marvin looked up, meeting Whizzer’s blinding smile. The clay near his eyes cracked at the movement. “Yeah. A reminder of warmth after a lifetime of cold.”

  


Whizzer giggled, walking over to the counter and fiddling with the mugs in his cupboard. “Thank you. You’re so sweet, babe.”

  


A smile twitched at Marvin’s lips. He scanned the room, searching for any changes since he last visited. The needle of Whizzer’s record player hovered over the vinyl settled on the platter. “What were you listening to?”

  


Whizzer looked over his shoulder, following Marvin’s gaze. “Oh. Slow music. I was picking through photos for a client and I felt like the stuff I usually listened to would be distracting.”

  


“Hm. Can I play it again?” Marvin wandered over to it, crouching to the ground and flipping through the record collection nestled under the shelf. A potted plant rested beside the player, a clever push at dimension to Whizzer’s apartment.

  


“Sure.” Whizzer’s back faced Marvin as he padded around his kitchen, pouring water and sugar into a bright red mug. He stirred it, sipping what was inside as he turned and leaned against the counter. 

  


Marvin placed the needle to the record, his body automatically relaxing as string instruments took advantage of the space around them. He closed his eyes and listened for a minute, letting his body truly settle down for the first time in days. Crouching got tiring, so he shuffled around, his legs to the side. His eyes snapped open when he realized the song “Is this Elvis Presley?”

  


Whizzer laughed once, suddenly next to Marvin, perched on the arm of his couch.. “Yeah. It’s calming. Makes me feel whole.” he sipped his drink, watching Marvin.

  


He stood up, taking the mug out of Whizzer’s hands and setting it on the shelf. “C’mere.” he pulled him gently into the open space between the kitchen and the living room. Whizzer’s expression was amused and confused as Marvin placed his free hand on his waist, lifting their hands into the air.

  


“Are we slow-dancing?” Whizzer’s eyes glittered, a smile stuck to his face.

  


“Mhm.” Marvin responded, grinning when Whizzer rested his arm around his neck. 

  


They spun slowly for a full minute. Marvin admired the man in front of him, tickling Whizzer’s intertwined hand with his thumb. It was hard to believe he could ever view girls as attractive. Whizzer was gorgeous. The embodiment of hope and beginning. No matter how alone and upset Marvin felt, Whizzer was always there to knot off any unfortunate parts of his life and start braiding a new strand.

  


Marvin stopped when the flowers caught his eye again. He let go of Whizzer, reaching towards the table and sliding a bloom out.

  


“‘Scuse me. Those are my flowers.” Whizzer watched with his hands on his hips.

  


“I bought them, Whiz.”

  


“Whatever. We’re having a good night, don’t be all possessive.”

  


Marvin gave an apologetic smile, drawing Whizzer closer by his waist. He had shortened the stem of one of the flowers so it would fit behind Whizzer’s ear. He batted at Whizzer’s hair, tucking the flower behind his ear and kissing him for the first time that night.

  


Whizzer’s lips were gentler than he remembered. They tasted like herbal tea and vanilla. The music continued to play as Whizzer pressed his thumb to Marvin’s cheek, pulling away.

  


“That felt needy.” Whizzer grinned, the white flower making his hazelnut eyes brighter.

  


And Marvin was again reminded of the difference in dynamic between Trina and Whizzer. Trina would have smiled shyly and turned submissive. Whizzer was flirty and charming about it. Marvin knew he had created a family. He knew he was unfaithful. But exploring his sexuality had to give him some sort of a pass, right? Right?

  


Whizzer brushed his thumb against Marvin’s face, pulling him out of his daze. Marvin kissed him again.

  


Whizzer giggled into Marvin’s mouth. “Okay, okay. Let’s dance again.” he took his hand and resumed their positions, encouraging Marvin to twirl him by raising his hand. He rested his forehead on Marvin’s, watching his expression. “Stop it.”

  


Marvin jumped. “What?”

  


“Stop thinking about your wife. Live in the moment. Dance with me.”

  


He paused, marvelling at Whizzer’s beauty again. “Right, yeah.”

  


They swayed back and forth, the song restarting in time with Marvin’s life. It was arguable that his methods were questionable, but Marvin was finally becoming himself again. He was growing to accept the way he felt, to explore the feelings. To touch and be touched. Have a new, better life.

  


Because of Whizzer.

**Author's Note:**

> do they fuck after this? it's up 2 u.


End file.
